Funny, interesting or weird quotes from books

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Read a book and you wanted to share that funny passage/phrase with someone? Or maybe you read a weird line that's so weird and odd it made you laugh? Or just made you go ?
Anything goes, from weird to interesting, from "oh my god, i can't stop laughing" to "my god, is this author insane?".
Share and bring a smile on our faces cause we so need them these days.


For the moment, I have no ideas, but I'm sure you do, so go on and post
for all
And remember, sharing is caring

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"Dragons eat you!" Taka snarled. "I am a secretary.I do not wear such ornate jewels, not unless you want everyone to believe my duties are as colorful and varied as your robes."
Raiden rolled his eyes. "I do wish people would stop maligning my clothes. What did these poor fabrics ever do to you?"
"Burn my eyes as if someone threw sand in them?"

[funkylover]

“Is he following? Can you have a flaming gay moment or something and check?”
“Why do I have to be the flaming gay one?” Dane made a small growl of contempt and proceeded to deliberately catch his heel on the toe of his other shoe, and it went flying, Murphy’s Law dictating that it must land in an oily puddle under a car tire. He let out a string of high-pitched sounds of dismay and threw his empty coffee cup with a theatrical toss. “Whaddya think?” he muttered.

“I used to smoke. I promised Dan I'd quit, and I've kept that promise for eleven years, but I still wish I had one when—” He stopped suddenly.
“When something makes you sad,” Richard guessed.
“Yeah.”
“I jerk off,” Richard lied.
Logan's head whipped around. “Every time you're sad?”
“Since I started doing that, everything makes me sad, but I feel so much better.”

(from "Family Unit" by Z.A. Maxwell)

Nepotism in itself isn’t evil, but when one is blind to the inadequacies or wrong-doing of those he favors, then it becomes an avenue for strife and ruin.

from Eressë - Cross Purposes


its so true......

[rory]

“It’s sad, in a way, how the body can remember the pain of darkness long after the soul has found the light switch.”

- Rhys, Enigma by Lloyd A. Meeker

Indeed, they will readily accept a lie for truth if it bolsters their stance, and dismiss a fact as fallacy should it inconveniently render their position indefensible. There’s no arguing with an ignorant bigot and even less chance of enlightening a close-minded one.

same book Eressë - Cross Purposes

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“I think you already know what I want,” the renegade Daoine Sidhe said, sweetly enough to make Rhys wish for an insulin syringe.


Kept Tears by Jana Dernado

[funkylover]

“Jesus,” Nate said, throwing his hands in the air as he stared Neil down. “You don‟t even know his last name!” Nate turned to Cassidy. “Is this Piper‟s Point or Dante’s Cove?”
“Mel-ho‟s Place!” Ollie yelled, his smile fading as Nate glared, letting him know this might not be the best time to play Who‟s the Queen of Pop Culture?

“I‟m gonna break that Neil guy‟s face the next time I see him.” Nate pressed the ice against his chin. “What the hell, Cass? Is your lube laced with heroin?

At Piper's Point - Ethan Day

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“What do you want?” he asked, knowing he sounded pitiful.

She turned away from the laptop to face him fully. She was smiling. “I want you to be a hero. A savior.”

“By doing what? Going to your hippie church on Sundays? Making some kind of donation? Renouncing my heathen homosexual ways? What?”

“I’m afraid… it’s going to be a little more difficult than that.”

“More difficult than renouncing? ’Cause lady, in case my porn selection didn’t clue you in, I’m riding the rainbow unicorn for sure. And I’ve been firmly in that saddle ever since my sister made me watch Dead Poets Society and I discovered Ethan Hawke.

From Pilgrimage by Kim Fielding

[funkylover]

One of the things he dearly loved about his mother was her ability to remain levelheaded and bossy even under extreme circumstances. If the zombie apocalypse happened, she would stand calmly in the middle of the street, telling the neighbors where to seek shelter and how to fashion weapons.



From Pilgrimage by Kim Fielding